It wasn't me, I promise. Here's 'Crappy News' for Tuesday, September 12th...

Hollywood, FL- A car dealer got greedy, and karma struck back.

The south Florida city opened up its public garage over the weekend and told people they could park their cars there for FREE to keep them safe during Hurricane Irma.

Artem Portnoy

So, naturally, the owner of an auto dealership tried to take advantage of the city's generosity. Police say Keijo Kiilo parked 47 vehicles from his inventory inside the garage. People, especially residents who PAY for the garage, were outraged and reported it to the city.

Yesterday afternoon, Kiilo was charged with 24 counts of using public ways for private business. Each count is worth a $500 fine and up to two months in jail. Luckily--for him--the other cars were removed before cops could write more tickets. [South Florida Sun-Sentinel]

People who use natural disasters for political or personal gain are the worst kinds of people, so I'm glad this dude got his.

Albuquerque, NM- A trio of thieves got scared straight.


Three men stole an SUV and U-Haul trailer from a hotel parking lot Sunday night. The suspects thought they were stealing stuff from people who were moving...what they actually stole was a casket with a dead body inside.

The owners of the SUV were driving from Oklahoma to New Mexico to bury a relative. The culprits ditched the SUV--with trailer still attached and the casket inside--and police found it Monday morning.

Daniel Gonzalez, Anthony Serna & Jeremy Soliz have been arrested for the theft [KOAT-TV]

I hope these guys have nightmares for a long, long time.

Bellevue, WA- More than 100 people were arrested in connection with a major prostitution sting.


Officers posted fake online ads for seven days and exchanged explicit text messages with potential clients telling them to meet at a nearby condominium. Police would then arrest the unsuspecting customers.

Among those busted was 50-year-old Mitch Levy, who co-hosts a local sports talk radio show in Seattle. Levy claimed that he'd played golf earlier in the day and that he was there "for a massage." He was charged with a misdemeanor count of patronizing a prostitute. [FOX Seattle]

On the bright side, there's probably a job opening in Seattle...

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